According to Jn 15:12, when Jesus gave us his commandment to “love one another, as I have loved you,” he gave us his example to follow. In the next three verses he shows us the kind of love we are supposed to have for one another. We are to love one another with:
Sacrificial love – Jn 15:13 – he laid down his life for us. As a mater of fact, he laid down his life for all men, Rom 5:6-10. However, we are to love those sacrificially who are our friends. In Rom 16:3-4, Paul said of Priscilla and Aquila, “who have for my life laid down their own necks.” And in Eph 5:25, husbands are told to love their wives “as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.” Man, if you aren’t willing to lay down your life for her you have no business marrying her.
Selective love – Jn 15:14 – ye are my friends if ye do whatsoever I command you. The Pharisees didn’t do what Jesus commanded them, i.e., Jn 6:29 believe. And he wasn’t their friend, as you can plainly see in Matt 23. He was, instead, a friend of publicans and sinners, Matt 11:19, because they did what he commanded them, Matt 21:28-32. So, we should love whom Jesus loves and not love whom he does not love. For instance, John wrote 1 Jn 2:15-17 and James wrote Jas 4:4 to direct us in our love. We should love those who love Jesus enough to keep his commandments, Jn 14:15.
Scriptural love – Jn 15:15 – Jesus said of his friends, “all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.” In Jn 16:12-14, that’s what the Holy Spirit does for us. This really refines the group you love the most. These are the true Bible believers. Jesus showed things to Peter, James, and John (i.e., the transfiguration, Matt 17:1-9) that he didn’t show the rest of his disciples. And he showed things to John, the disciple whom he loved, (Jn 13:23-26) that he didn’t show the rest of the disciples. John was the one disciple to whom God gave the Revelation.
Conclusion: when Jesus told us to love one another, as I have loved you, he gave us his perfect example to follow, so we would know how to do this. We must be willing to lay down our lives for our friends. Jesus doesn’t expect us to love everybody equally, but he does tell us to love those who are obedient to his commands. And the ones we will love the most are the ones who love his words the most.