Give folks seeking wisdom counsel from the Bible so they can decide what to do.

You’re not telling them what to do.  You’re showing them what God says so they can consider him when making a decision.

Watch out for the need to be needed.

You’ll keep them dependent upon you so that you can feel good about ministering to them.

Pray while they are speaking.

Listen to God while you’re listening to them so that you’ll know what to say.

Probe with discerning questions.

Often you can’t understand what they’re trying to tell you without asking for clarification.

Point them to the scripture.

The Bible has the answer for every concern they have and every decision they’re making.

Only give them one doable thing at a time.

Otherwise, you’ll overwhelm them with too much to do.

Let your wisdom rest.

Often, you know what to say, but they’re not ready to hear it.  Wait till they’ll listen and follow.

Limit discussing your personal experiences with sin.

You can easily defile them with too much information about you and your past.

Never give one-sided marriage counsel.

The husband and wife need to be with you together.  The problems are never one-sided.

Offer premarital instruction.

Couples spend six months to a year planning a wedding that lasts one day.  Why not spend six months preparing for the marriage and commit to make it last a lifetime.  This is an outline of what I teach in premarital instruction: Several Messages on Marriage.

Know the difference between those seeking counsel and those holding a news conference.

Those holding a news conference are announcing to you plans they have already decided.